I Go Into Me
I am using my intelligence, my attention, to look into ‘me’ – me who feels the steadiness, the sweetness or the rightness of just being here. I am looking into a sort of nothing. I might say it is black. But that’s only because there is no light in here; no starlight.
The human mind can’t stand nothing. It cannot stand looking at nothing for long. But I am asking you to look inside and see nothing. For as I see nothing, I become nothing and this is how I clear my mind. I clarify my consciousness. I take the past, the movement, out of my consciousness, by looking at nothing inside.
This is how my mind gets the power to see straight. This is where, when the time comes, I will get the equilibrium, the steadiness, the one-pointedness to look into my self; or to look into my living life and see straight and clear, because there will be nothing in the way.
I am looking at nothing. I am being nothing. Here in this stillness and this silence, in the being of nothing, here is where the tortured human mind and emotions will become disturbed and produce something for my attention to look at. My mind of awareness can only focus on the things of the senses. It will be looking for something with its awareness. But in seeing nothing and being nothing, I am using my consciousness. Only consciousness can be used for this purpose of looking at nothing inside. I will notice my mental awareness endeavouring to project something into this stillness and silence to catch my attention. And that something will be a thought. That’s the red herring the human mind loves to throw left, right and centre – anything to distract my beautiful clarity from joining me - the ‘most high’ which is the most descent into me.
The human mind is connected to the pain in the self. Any thought will start off to be about nothing in particular but it won’t be long before the mind latches onto some emotional problem. And then it leads you a merry dance, being busy with your self until you have lost me. So, come on back. Look into me. Relax. Be easy. Give up. Enjoy looking into me, seeing nothing.
In ‘going into me’ we have another option. That is to feel the good inside of me. I truly sink into the peace, the sweetness, the easiness, the well-being that has no opposite. It is right to be here. It is good to be here. I am coming home.
As I sink down I may be aware that way out on the perimeter of my consciousness my mind is trying to throw in some thought. But because I am focused on nothing, or on the relief and blessedness of coming home, I will be able to keep the thought out there - without trying. For thought cannot cross into consciousness. But that does not mean I am not aware of it endeavouring to subvert or seduce me.
Every second my attention is descending into me. There is no end to the depth of me. In the absence of any thing there is just more silence, more stillness, more reality. As I truly descend I will feel relief and sooner or later I will know that I am coming home because my attention came out of this place. I had to pass this way, upwards. My attention came out this way and became engrossed in my physical awareness. That is the truth. The mind cannot explain it. The mind cannot even come in here to analyse it. The mind is right out on the perimeter … Perhaps it has totally disappeared. In here is the source of clarity, honesty, love, rightness. In here is my true being, the black, the deep, out of which I come.
Sometimes, as I go into me, I leave my mental awareness behind and my body, the shape of it, disappears. Then I notice, on the perimeter, that my imagination will reconstitute parts of my body. I will be drawn to an arm or a leg, and my awareness in desperation will endeavour to recreate my body - because it cannot stand not to be a body. But I who would be me - I who would be the ‘most high’ by descending into the most deep - I must be nobody. And if I only focus on me, it just happens.
Do not leave me. Do not think. If I go deep enough into this stillness and silence inside of me, I reach a place that is called God. I will have no doubt when I reach it but no-one can ever describe what it is. So many have tried to find God. This is where God is. It is where God is accessible to my consciousness. I cannot use my mental awareness to enter this place, for that is what I use whenever I open my eyes and go about my daily business. My mental awareness will never, ever enter this place. That’s why no scientist has ever found the secret of life and never will. For this is life - in me. I am life.
Emotion Is Past