Blame and judgment
“You must give up judging yourself. … Every time you lie down and want to doubt yourself and think about … anything, don’t think. But if you think about anything, you will suffer. … When I blame another, I blame myself. When I judge another, I will judge myself.”
“If you're free of unhappiness and you're not putting your emotions on other people, they don’t come back to you. … If you are emotional … you will get emotional people … as you sow, so shall you reap.”
“We can have such harmony, as long as we don't accuse each other or undermine each other, or blame each other … then harmony can reign.”
Barry Long speaks of blame and judgment as inherited patterns of unhappiness passed down through generations. He explains that to live truly, one must see that blaming others or oneself only darkens the light within—the inner intelligence or love that is our true being. Judgment and blame are not life, but learned behaviours mistaken as normal – because everyone does it we consider it to be normal. These emotional reactions cloud our spiritual clarity and perpetuate conflict in relationships and within ourselves. For Barry, these patterns are part of the self that must be surrendered if one wishes to live freely, without suffering. The path out is to stop identifying with the emotional reactions and instead allow the intelligence of life to dissolve them through stillness and self-awareness.
He emphasises that freedom begins when a person no longer blames anyone—not even themselves—for their circumstances. Instead of fighting or resisting difficult situations or people, one must surrender inwardly to the unknown source of life. This surrender is not weakness but true strength: the refusal to feed the self's habit of reacting, judging, or accusing. Barry says this purification is essential to awaken the deeper light of intelligence and love within, which has been dimmed by lifetimes of conditioned behaviour. In essence, he teaches that giving up blame and judgment is the beginning of real transformation and spiritual maturity.
SESSIONS

The End of Suffering
Video length: 1 hour and 17 minutes
Freedom from suffering begins with giving up blame, judgment, and emotional attachment – and when one lives from inner stillness and intelligence rather than thought or inherited patterns. Real love is impersonal and free of self, known through presence, not emotion or memory.